Lovie Dovie Day
It’s the corniest time of the year
To romantics everywhere, Valentine’s Day is their second Christmas(or would it be first since it’s at the beginning of year?). To the rest of us, the holiday is one giant sigh.
Obviously there are different groups with different reactions that need to be broken down. First there are the “happily ever after” couples who feel like their relationship is grounded into the foundations of the Earth. Unflinching and unwavering, these disgusting people go all out on affection and gifts. They are the ones that buy dozens of roses, recycled Hallmark cards, and rediculously priced chocolate. Basically they feel the need to fit the stereotypical image of the average couple during Cupid day.
Next are the laid back couples. The pairs that laugh at the hysteria that surrounds Valentines Day and go about like it’s just every other day. Maybe they’ll sneak in a gift or surprise or two to make it seem like they really do care but even if they forget, who cares? It’s just another superficial holiday.
Third are the yearning singles. These saps try to hold a straight face on V-Day(note: I hate the term V-Day just sounds inappropriate) without breaking down into a puddle of sticky self-pity. They try to make it seem like they don’t care but instead they vie for the attention of any semi-attractive other within a 12 block radius.
Lastly are the singles who just don’t give a damn. Carefree, strolling down the street. They can’t help but chuckle like the laid back couples at the prancing hooligans who make a big fuss about Valentines Day. These singles don’t need a valentine and even if they get one it seems like a ceremonial occurrence than any telltale signs of affection. Satisfied bachelors and bachelorettes like these are hard to find, and when they do appear everyone tries to make them out to be liars or hypocrites just because they don’t fall in with everyone else.
Unsurprisingly, many people fall into the sappy trap of commercial love. It seems like such a quick, easy, simple way to get to the other’s heart. Society obligates us to give smooches and spread the love when in our reality we just want to be left alone to deal with our own relationships. In the spirit of corniness (get your wincing muscles ready) I must say that I don’t have any love for Valentines Day.